Living an Orthodox life - fasting

"But the days will come when the bridegroom will be taken away from them, and then they will fast. (Matthew 9:15)"

If there is one aspect of living an Orthodox Christian life that sharply distinguishes it from every other "brand" of Christianity, it is fasting. The frequency, and at times the severity, of the prescribed fasting discipline in Orthodoxy simply has no parallel in any of the other Christian denominations. Before we get to the guidelines, let's define a few of the terms:

-fasting: this is a general term that ranges in meaning from not eating anything to not eating specific foods (normally referred to as abstinence by Roman Catholics)

-animal products: this means meat, eggs, dairy, animal oil (such as lard), etc.

-meat: this means any meat from an animal with a backbone; so, for example, beef, chicken, and tuna all qualify as meat, but scallops and shrimp do not

-dairy: this means all dairy, including milk, cheese, ice cream, yogurt...everything

-oil: this means olive oil

OK, now for a brief overview of the guidelines:

-we fast from animal products, oil, and alcohol on the weekdays of the 7 weeks before Pascha (the Orthodox name for Easter), and from animal products on the weekends; so, in 2011, this includes the "40 days" from 7 March through 15 April, Lazarus Saturday (16 April), Palm Sunday (17 April), and Holy Week (18 through 23 April); this is normally referred to as the "Great Fast", and includes limiting the number of meals to three per day (usually less than three in monastic communities), as well as not eating between meals;

-the one day for which an exception is made during the Great Fast is 25 March, the Feast of the Annunciation, when we are allowed to have fish, alcohol, and oil

-the first day of the Great Fast and Holy Friday (called Good Friday in the West) are days of total fasting...no food, period; in monastic communities, this is extended to include other days during the first week of the Great Fast and Holy Week

-we fast from all meat except fish during the week before Great Lent

-from 15 November through 24 December (usually referred to as the Nativity Fast or St. Philip's fast),

• we fast from animal products, alcohol, and oil on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday
• we fast from animal products on Tuesday and Thursday
• we fast from animal products (except fish) on Saturday and Sunday
• exceptions to the above are made for several feast days that fall between 15 November and 24 December
  

-the guidelines for the Great Fast apply from 1 August through 14 August in preparation fort he Feast of the Dormition of Mary

-the guidelines for the Nativity Fast apply from the Monday 8 days after Pentecost through 28 June in preparation for the feast of Sts. Peter and Paul

-we fast from animal products, oil, and alcohol on the following days

• 5 Jaunary, in preparation for the Feast of the Theophany
• 29 August, the Commemoration of the Beheading of St. John the Baptist
• 14 September, the Feast of the Elevation of the Cross
  

-we do not fast in any way

• during Bright Week (the week following Pascha)
  
• from 25 December through 4 January
• during Trinity Week (the week following Pentecost)
• the third week before Great Lent (preceding the Sunday on which the parable of the prodigal son is read)
  

-on all remaining Wednesdays and Fridays (unless an exception is made for a particular feast), we fast from animal products, oil, and alcohol

All together, that's about half of the days of the year, give or take depending on the relationship between Pascha and the Feast of Sts. Peter and Paul. Like I said, there is no counterpart in any of the other Christian denominations.

That being said, Orthodoxy does not hold to the "legalistic" view of fasting taken by Roman Catholics and assumed by Protestants when the topic of fasting or any other ascetical discipline comes up. We do not believe that anyone (Orthodox or not) who does not follow the fasting discipline is therefore committing a sin or, worse, is going to go to hell. Rather, the Church sets these guidelines as a goal, much in the same way a trainer sets a goal of running so many miles or eating a certain diet for an athlete. Instead, the sin is the pride that accompanies the thought that we don't need to train ourselves, that we know better than God what we need to do to grow in our relationship with Him, and that we can pick and choose which parts of the Gospel we follow. In short, it is the idea that we can dictate the terms of our salvation that gets us into trouble, and what makes it worse is our denial that we try to dictate the terms. None of us would admit that we try to run the show when it comes to getting to heaven, and yet our actions betray our real feelings. Questions such as, "Does God really care if I fast?" and "Does God really care how I pray?" show that we are trying to ignore the parts of the Gospel that tell us about the importance of fasting and that indicate how we are to pray. And by fasting, we take a step in the direction of humility, the humility necessary to grow closer to God and, in knowing Him better, to begin to taste eternal life.

Living an Orthodox life - prayer

"And they continued steadfastly in the apostles’ doctrine and fellowship, in the breaking of bread, and in the prayers. (Acts 2:42)"

"...pray without ceasing,..." (1 Thessalonians 5:17)

The prayer life of an Orthodox Christian consists of two important and ultimately inseparable parts: private prayer and liturgical prayer. To say that we only really need private prayer and that going to church is optional is to deny the fact that Jesus founded a community, not a philosophical movement or even a religion. To say that all we need to do is go to church for an hour or two each week is to deny that Jesus taught us to pray privately (Matthew 6:6). Both are important, both are essential, but neither is sufficient.

The corporate worship of the Orthodox Church consists primarily of the following:

(1) The Divine Liturgy, originally written in the late 4th or early 5th century, is the main Eucharistic celebration of the Church. It consists of two main parts which historically grew from the Jewish synagogue and temple services. The first part focuses on the Scriptures, with the high point being a reading from one of the Epistles and a reading from one of the Gospels. The second focuses on the Eucharist, which Orthodox believe to be the Body and Blood of Christ. Those familiar with the Roman Catholic Mass should be able to see in the Divine Liturgy the same basic structure. The people stand for the entire Liturgy (except possibly for the sermon), which takes approximately two hours and is chanted (a capella, including the reading).

(2) The daily cycle of prayer, which includes Vespers, Compline, the Midnight Office, Matins, and the Hours (1st, 3rd, 6th, and 9th). While all of these can be said privately, especially when the service is not offered at a local church, the intent of these services is for the community to come together to pray. For the most part, the only communities that hold all of the services on a daily basis are the monastic communities (monks and nuns).

(3) Other special services, such as weddings, funerals (called the parastasis or panikhida), and akathists (special canons of prayers for things like the beginning of the Church year).

To understand all of this from an Orthodox standpoint, you need to realize that the services are ancient. The structure of the services of the daily cycle dates to the first century, and is essentially a Christianized version of one of the sets of daily prayers mentioned in Acts. Specifically, in Acts 3:1 it mentions the prayers of the ninth hour, Acts 10:9 mentions the prayers of the sixth hour, and Acts 2:42 is properly translated “…in the breaking of the bread and in the prayers,” meaning the daily cycle of prayers. The daily cycle of worship was common in Judaism at the time, and is common in Orthodox monasteries to this day, where “day” refers to sundown to sundown, not midnight to midnight).

Incense is used throughout the worship services of the Old Testament, and is also mentioned in the book of Revelation when describing the worship of God in heaven. As such, incense is used extensively in Orthodox worship. The deacon censes the iconostasis, the icons around the church, and the people, and the idea is from Psalm 140 (LXX): “Let my prayer arise to You as incense…” The incense represents the prayers from us and from the saints rising to God.

It should be obvious that we Orthodox do not see a need to invent or modernize our services; we see our services as being the Christian worship handed down to us by Christ through the Apostles, and as such there is no need to change anything. The common word we use to describe this is Tradition (with a capital "T", indicating that we believe this to be the Tradition of God and not the tradition of men). Admittedly, the danger exists that saying essentially the same prayers every day and every week can become more rote and ritual than actual prayer. However, a closer examination reveals that the danger of prayer becoming something is isn't supposed to be exists in every tradition. If the common parts of Orthodox services become mere repetition, they lose their meaning. If, on the other hand, there is a realization that these prayers are repeated because they are the most important prayers, then paying extra attention to them and praying them all the more fervently becomes the norm…as it should be. The same thing can happen with the Lord’s Prayer…try praying it slowly, line-by-line, and you’ll see what I mean. “Spontaneous prayer” can quickly devolve into a long string of “please God do this for me” type prayers, at the expense of both praise and worship. And none of the above, even if taken seriously, can really get us close to 1 Thessalonians 5:17, “…pray without ceasing..."

Sadly, private prayer can also devolve into the above mentioned "prayers". To this, Orthodoxy offers one a deceptively simple prayer, basically an extension of the “Lord, have mercy” from the daily services, known as the Jesus prayer: “Lord, Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, the sinner.” Lots of books have been written on this prayer. It is full of the essential doctrines of Christianity, and prayed slowly and seriously, it is a surprisingly powerful prayer. Again here, though, if it becomes just “vain repetition”, then it’s a waste of time. I say this prayer a lot every day, and allowing it to run through my mind even when I'm not trying to say it is as close to 1 Thessalonians 5:17 closer to reality as I have been able to get.

That's not to say that "standardized" prayer is everything or that "spontaneous" prayer is all bad. Both can be positive, and both can be misused and misdirected. Ultimately, what we need to keep in mind in prayer is what we need to keep in mind in everything: Thy Will be done. Worship should be done according to God's design, not according to our tastes. God knows our need better than we do, so there's really no need to ask for specifics, especially since we often don't know what we really need.

So when it comes to prayer, it should be no surprise that the way Jesus taught is to pray has, at its heart, the phrase that is easy to see but difficult to live: Thy Will be done.

Living an Orthodox life - the goal

OK, before we get started, let's set the goal: what is an Orthodox Christian life supposed to look like? The best description I've heard is from Fr. Andrew Stephen Damick. He's the pastor at St. Paul Orthodox church in Emmaus, PA, and does podcacsts on Ancient Faith radio (www.ancientfaith.com). Here's his description:

"To put it even more plainly, what does a real Orthodox Christian look like? He comes to worship more than just Sunday mornings, because he cannot get enough of worshipping Christ. He schedules his calendar around the Church calendar. He tithes his income, giving back ten percent of what God has given him for the work of the Kingdom, or at least giving some regular percentage and gradually working toward ten percent, which is the Old Testament Biblical minimum; the New Testament standard is one hundred percent. He serves in the Church giving of his time and talents for the life of the local parish in its worship, education, and maintenance. He takes fasting seriously, and always looks to the next year's set of fasts and asks himself what he can do to take his practice to the next level. He looks for opportunities to give charitably to others, both monetarily and in terms of his time. He receives the sacraments regularly, including at least weekly Communion and confession several times a year. He goes on pilgrimage to holy places. In his fasting and confession he takes a serious look at himself and repents of his sins. He looks for opportunities to educate himself in his faith, both in private reading and in taking classes offered at his parish and elsewhere. And he does all of these things in conversation with and in freely chosen obedience to his father confessor. That is what a normal Orthodox Christian life looks like."

Please keep in mind that this is the goal. I know I don't live up to this description, I know it's a lofty goal, and I know I may never get there. But there's no excuse to not try to get as close to the goal as possible. And to the common response, "Surely God doesn't expect us to do all of that. I mean, you'd have to be close to perfect to do all of that." I have only one thing to say: "Therefore you shall be perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect."

Living an Orthodox life

Orthodoxy is not consumer friendly.

There are many, many reasons that I could give to try to convince someone to turn toward Orthodox Christianity and realize that it is the Faith given to the Apostles by Christ. However, one of the "hurdles" in accepting this is that living an Orthodox life is not easy. One of the unfortunate parts of many Christian denominations today is that there is a conscious effort to make living a Christian life easy. In fact, many congregations hire marketing firms to determine how best to increase their numbers, and are completely willing to change their doctrine and practices if it means increasing their membership. Coming to church, while helpful, is seen as optional in some congregations. Confession of sins is personal...there's no need for any sort of a public confession. Fasting is rarely even mentioned. Even more lamentable is the emphasis placed on what believing in Christ can do for you here and now, and how much better your life will be, not just spiritually but materially, if you just believe in Jesus.

This is clearly not the Faith as it was lived by the Apostles and those who came immediately after them. Of the Apostles, only St. John was not martyred. We know from the Bible that the first Christians went to the synagogue to pray, that they "continued steadfastly in the apostles’ doctrine and fellowship, in the breaking of bread, and in the prayers." Note that this is not just any prayers, but the prayers; there was a consistent, set pattern to the worship, with specific prayers to be said. Confession of sins was made to the entire congregation. Following their Jewish ancestors and seeing in Christ's words a need to do so, they fasted regularly. And clearly their lives were not comfortable from a materialistic standpoint.

Christ did not change His words or His teachings because people did not accept Him (John 6); rather, He let those who turned away from Him go, respecting the gift of free will He had given them. He did not cater to their wants, feelings, and personal tastes. Instead, He knew what they needed, and told them what they should do. The first Christians were willing to humbly admit that God knew better what they needed than they themselves did, and chose to follow Christ's recommendations, which included being a member of the community which He founded, the Church. This humility is something we have lost over the years. We tend to think that we know what is best for us, especially when it comes to our spiritual lives. The reality is that we're human, and "what's best for us" tends to be equated with "what is easiest for us", "what is convenient for us", "what makes us feel good", etc., none of which sounds like "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me."

Orthodoxy claims to be Faith handed to the Apostles by Christ, both in terms of its beliefs and in terms of its practices. So, over the next several posts I will attempt to describe what it means to live an Orthodox life, a life I strive to live, sometimes successfully (with God's help), sometimes not (when I try to do things on my own). No, it's not easy nor convenient. Rather, the goal of living an Orthodox life is to grow in my relationship with Christ, a goal that is more than worth any effort I can humbly put into it.

Journey to Orthodoxy, part 5

My second visit to an Orthodox Church was very different than my first. For one thing, I wasn't 90 minutes early for Liturgy. Also, the entire Liturgy was in English, not Greek. For these and several other reasons, not the least of which was the friendly and inviting congregation, the first visit to Christ the Savior/Holy Spirit was very comfortable.

Don't get me wrong, visiting an Orthodox Church for the first time can be a very overwhelming experience. The Divine Liturgy of St. John Chrysostom and the entire mindset of Eastern worship are so different from what the vast majority of Americans are used to that it can take some time just to process what has been experienced.

I, on the other hand, had an advantage. Having been Byzantine Catholic for 15 years, and a cantor for about 13 of the 15 years, I knew the Liturgy. Other than a few differences in the choice of words, which was just a different translation from the original rather than actually being different, the Divine Liturgy at Christ the Savior/Holy Spirit was the same as it was at St. John Chrysostom, so blending in was easy. I knew about reverencing the icons, standing for the entire two hours, making the sign of the cross at every mention of the Trinity, etc. To the casual observer, it would have been easy to mistake me for Orthodox. From the standpoint of the Liturgy, I was very comfortable from the beginning.

Of course, I was not able to receive the Eucharist at Christ the Savior. While from the Catholic standpoint it is perfectly acceptable for a Catholic to receive Communion at an Orthodox church, from the Orthodox standpoint it is not allowed. The basic gist of it is that when it comes to the sacraments, the Catholic Church pays attention to "validity", meaning that as long as certain almost legalistic conditions are met, then the sacraments are valid. Based on that, the Catholic Church recognizes Orthodox sacraments as being valid. That doesn't mean that the Catholic Church looks kindly on receiving the sacraments at another church. The lack of a nearby Catholic church is usually one of the requirements for receiving "approval" to receive the sacraments at an Orthodox church...but it's at least possible. However, for the Orthodox, the sacraments demonstrate a common faith, a completely common set of beliefs. As such, to receive the sacraments at an Orthodox church, you need to be Orthodox.

I stayed for the entire Liturgy, and then quietly slipped out while the rest of the congregation went downstairs for coffee hour. On the ride home, I had about 20-25 minutes to think, to reflect, and to plan what I was going to tell Terrie. I knew that I needed to go back to Christ the Savior again, to continue experiencing Orthodoxy "from the inside" (or at least as inside as a non-Orthodox can get), and most importantly I needed to contact the priest. Fortunately, the priest at Christ the Savior was (and is) very e-mail friendly, so making contact was completely non-threatening.

Terrie was very reserved, and to be honest it was tough to get a read on what she was feeling. While I wasn't ready to "jump ship" yet, I was at least ready to take a closer look at the new ship. On the other hand, Terrie was very adamant on one specific point: she wanted to remain Catholic. So, over the next couple months, I went back to Christ the Savior, alone, and never staying for coffee hour because in the back of my mind I knew I was "just visiting", with no intention of becoming Orthodox, at least not until I could get Terrie to consider it. I was now on the priest’s e-mail list, so I was receiving his weekly meditations (usually expanded versions of his Sunday homilies), which helped me gain a deeper insight into Orthodoxy, especially with the stuff that is left out of or briefly mentioned in the books I had read. And with each new insight, I would try to bring up the subject to Terrie of going to church with me. After several more months, she finally agreed, I think more to appease me than anything else, but I wasn't about to be picky at this point.

By now, I was now used to standing for the entire two hour Liturgy. Terrie was not, and the kids were not used to doing anything for two hours straight, let alone standing in church. And while the Liturgy was familiar enough, during the discussions that followed our visit Terrie was focused on the differences and all of the reasons why we should never go back. It wasn't easy to listen to it, but it was important. For all of my building enthusiasm, Terrie was a good, important "reality check". She kept me from jumping to Orthodoxy too quickly, forcing me to completely understand what it was I was thinking of doing (and asking her to do). On the other hand, I was forcing her to consider the impossible: leave Catholicism.

Over the next few months, I went alone several times and we went together (with the kids) several times, both to Liturgy on Sunday morning and to Vespers on Saturday evening (including one disastrous Saturday when Vespers had been cancelled, but we didn't know it, so we arrived at a locked church). One of the deals I had made with Terrie was that we would leave just as communion began to be distributed, which would take about 20 minutes off of the service and make it a bit more palatable for the kids. The people in the congregation were gently doing their best to get us to "take the next step" by inviting us to stay for coffee hour, inviting us to have the kids stay for church school, etc. But at this point, neither of us wanted to make any further commitment, not wanting to "tease" anyone into thinking we were going to convert.

By 2004, we were going to Christ the Savior every week. Together, Terrie and I were learning more and more, and little by little were becoming convinced that Orthodoxy was, for lack of a better term, "right". Not just right for us, not just right for our kids, but right. Theologically, those three major points I mentioned in an earlier post had come into full view. The pope not being infallible was easy enough to agree with, but knowing how this developed historically provided a basis for stating it definitively. The "filioque" clause of the creed and the procession of the Holy Spirit, and the subsequent distortions it causes to our understanding of the Trinity were more subtle, but still important. The important difference to me, however, was the concept of original sin.

The concept of original sin in Western Christianity was and still is strongly influenced by St. Augustine. Despite the fact that he is an Orthodox saint, his ideas on original sin are, for the most part, rejected by Orthodoxy. What it comes down to is the answer to one simple question (simple to ask, anyway): What were the repercussions of the sin of Adam and Eve? In Western Christianity, the sin of Adam and Eve caused a fundamentally change in our human nature, to the point that we are born sinful. In Catholic thought, we are guilty of the sin of Adam and Eve, and the sacramental part of baptism is the washing away of this sin. This lead to the Catholic belief that babies who died before they were baptized could not go to heaven, which lead to the belief in limbo. It also lead to the belief in the Immaculate Conception of Mary (which is the belief that Mary was born without original sin): since Jesus was without sin, and since original sin was passed on through reproduction, then Mary must have been without original sin.

In Orthodox thought, original sin did not change our nature in this way. Original sin caused our physical mortality, and that mortality is what is passed along through reproduction. However, we are not born sinful, and we certainly are not guilty of the sin of anyone else, including Adam and Eve. Yes, we are born with a strong inclination to sin, but it’s still our choice whether or not we actually sin. As such, Orthodoxy does not have any theology regarding the Immaculate Conception or limbo.

By early 2005, we had pretty much made up our minds that it was time to make a commitment one way or the other. “Just visiting” wasn’t fair to the kids. They needed a spiritual home (and so did we), and having them only partially experience the Faith wasn’t providing that for them. To begin preparations, Terrie and I had several sessions with the priest, delving into some of the details of the Faith, making sure we understood what it was we were saying we believed. We began staying for the entire Liturgy and for coffee hour, the kids began attending church school classes, and everything else just seemed to fall into place. There was, however, one major sticking point to completely committing to Orthodoxy: our parents. From the time I was a teenager, my parents had always said that they would support any decision I made with regard to religion, as long as I remained a Christian. But, saying you'll be supportive is a lot easier when you're not actually faced with the reality, and I honestly wasn't sure how they'd react. However, both Terrie and I were absolutely convinced how her mom would react (her dad had died somewhat suddenly in December 2001). As such neither of us wanted to mention the fact that we were now regularly attending a non-Catholic church, certainly didn't mention the fact that we were in the process of converting to a different faith, and we carefully side-stepped any questions about church when they came up.

On the positive side, my parents were true to their word and were supportive of our decision. Although I’m sure there was and is some pain on their part, they saw the same need for a spiritual home as we did, especially for the kids, and understood that given the choice between Latin-Rite Catholic and Orthodoxy, there really wasn’t a choice for us. On the neutral to negative side, we have never really had a discussion about our conversion with Terrie’s mom. As important to our lives as the Faith has become, it’s just not an available topic. Truth be told, we’ve only had limited discussions with my parents about the details of the Faith, but at least the topic isn’t quite as “taboo”.

So, finally, on 18 December 2005, more than 20 years after I began learning about Orthodoxy, the six of us were received into the Orthodox Church. I can honestly say that it is a decision we have never regretted. It has not been easy, but it is the right decision. To be honest, I don’t see it so much as a decision to convert as a revelation. God had been calling to me for years. I finally started listening, really listening, and really responding. It is a response that continues daily, and will, Lord have mercy, continue forever.

Journey to Orthodoxy, part 4

Between 1987 and 2002, there were a few changes that took place in my life:

- Terrie and I got married;

-we became actively involved in the parish, and I became a cantor;

- we had four children;

- we moved to Newark (Ohio), then to Cincinnati, and finally to Mason (Ohio).

Despite the difficulties involved in being Byzantine Catholic, we were true to our faith. The difficulties were, in many ways, unavoidable:

(1) The rest of the family, on both sides, was and is Latin-Rite Catholic. This made our wedding at St. John Chrysostom interesting, to say the least. Of course we knew what to expect, and courtesy of the rehearsal so did the people in the wedding party (well, sort of at least), but everyone else was in for a ride. The ceremony itself, being the marriage ceremony embedded in a Divine Liturgy, takes about 1 hour 45 minutes. Couple that with the fact that we had an icon blessed during the ceremony and the whole thing took close to two hours. To be clear, this is two hours of completely unfamiliar territory for everyone else in the church; they weren’t familiar with the Divine Liturgy itself, let alone the extra parts that are included in the wedding ceremony. For starters, the couple walk into the church together in the Byzantine Rite ceremony. The father giving the bride away is left over from the days of dowries, and since the Eastern Churches never knew this practice, the tradition of giving the bride away has never existed. If Terrie’s dad was saddened about not being able to “give away” the youngest of his 11 children (and I’d imagine he was), he never said a word. Then there is the crowning, which is the climax of the wedding service. The crowns are signs of the glory and honor with which God crowns the couple during the Mystery. The bride and groom are crowned as the king and queen of their home, of their domestic church, which they will rule with fear of God, wisdom, justice and integrity. There is no parallel to this in the Latin Rite.

(2) All of our children were baptized, chrismated (confirmed), and received the Eucharist for the first time at St. John Chrysostom. These were also completely different experiences for our Latin-Rite relatives. First and foremost, all three of the sacraments are administered by the priest on the same day when the child is an infant (as opposed to baptism for infants, “First Communion” around age 7 and confirmation around age 14 administered by the bishop). Baptism is by triple-immersion in a font large enough to accommodate this. The Eucharist is both the Body and Blood together in one chalice and is distributed to the faithful by means of a spoon which the priest uses to place the Eucharist in the mouth of the communicant, and the “bread” used is leavened. Those of you who are Latin-Rite Catholic are probably asking, “This is Catholic?” Yep, it is. I won’t get into all of the theological details here that explain the differences (first because I don’t have all the answers and second because that in and of itself could fill at least one large book), but if you’re interested please ask and I’ll do my best.

(3) There is not a Byzantine Catholic church in Newark, Ohio, nor is there one in Cincinnati. When we lived in Newark, we drove back to St. John Chrysostom in Columbus (about a 35-minute drive one way), and after moving to Southwest Ohio we drove to St. Barbara, a mission parish in Dayton, Ohio (a 55-minute drive one way from Cincinnati and a 35-minute drive one way from Mason). No, it wasn’t easy, especially with the kids. But it was worth it.

That is, it was worth it until a new priest was assigned to St. Barbara’s. The priest in Columbus had often joked that a lot of people, including a lot of priests, told him he was “too Orthodox”. The first priest in Dayton was a priest that had visited St. John Chrysostom several times before we moved to Cincinnati, so in going to St. Barbara we were dealing with a “known entity”…one who got along with the priest at St. John Chrysostom and one who made the same joke about being “too Orthodox”. (As an aside, the priest at St. Barbara has since converted and is an Orthodox priest. I guess he finally got tired of the joke and decided to make it the truth instead.) We really didn’t appreciate the fact that these two priests were so Orthodox until we had to deal with one that wasn’t. Granted, when we went on vacation to Lake Erie and went to a Byzantine-Rite church there, it was decidedly “less Orthodox”, meaning that some of the prayers were shortened or skipped and that other shortcuts were taken to make the Liturgy about an hour long instead of the usual 90 minutes, so we knew we had been blessed at our home parishes. But when the new priest arrived at St. Barbara, more than just the length of the Liturgy changed. There was a change in the atmosphere. It’s sort of one of those intangible things that you can’t really describe, but along with the changes in the Liturgy, the life of the parish changed. The homilies were no longer focused on the Scriptures, theology, and daily living. I lost count on how many times the new priest mentioned Vietnam in his sermons (keep in mind, this around the year 2000 we’re talking about here).

Finally, during Liturgy one Saturday afternoon, I reached the end. During a homily in which the priest stated that soldiers were the same as abortionists, I walked out. I was the cantor…the only cantor…and I walked out, never to return. Having had many discussions about the priest with Terrie, she knew that things had been building for a while, and was aware that when I had said, “Someday, I may just walk out,” that I meant it.

So there we were, with no place to call home. It took a while for things to settle down to the point that we could look rationally at the situation. When we finally did, we quickly realized that there were only two viable options:

(1) return to the Latin Rite;

(2) look at Orthodoxy

Neither met with Terrie’s approval. The Latin Rite was still as empty as it ever was; we knew this from visiting our relatives and going to their churches over the years. If anything, it had gotten worse, and resembled Protestantism more than ever. The bad experience at the Greek Orthodox Church back in the late 80’s still lingered in Terrie’s mind. For me, there was only one option: look at Orthodoxy. Knowing from experience that reading about it was not enough, I knew that I needed to visit another Orthodox church, or possibly several, and get a feel for it. I knew I needed to talk to the priests and start finding out first-hand about it. With Terrie’s permission, I began the next stage of “the journey” alone. I hadn’t been to church by myself in a very long time, realistically since my freshman year at Ohio State. Unsettled doesn’t even really begin to describe how I felt. I didn’t know if Orthodoxy was the answer, but I knew that just not going to church was not the answer. So, in 2002, I went, alone, to Christ the Savior/Holy Spirit Orthodox Church for the first time.

Journey to Orthodoxy, part 3

Welcome to Byzantium

Growing up, I never knew that Byzantine Catholicism existed, let alone that there was a Byzantine Catholic church in Columbus. Most Latin-Rite Catholics are completely unaware that there are seven different Catholic rites; in fact, most don't even realize that they are Latin-Rite Catholics.

The obvious question: what is a "rite"? Essentially, a rite is a set of traditions that spell out how the sacraments and services are to be celebrated. Historically, as the Church spread throughout the Roman Empire, different communities and cultures developed different ways of celebrating the sacraments. Currently, seven of these rites have survived, one of which is the Byzantine Rite. The rite that pretty much everyone thinks of when the word "Catholic" is used is the Latin Rite.

So, picking up the story from the previous post...

Courtesy of an assignment she received in home-ec, Terrie and I were off to St. John Chrysostom Byzantine Catholic Church. Just walking into the church, I couldn't help but realize two things: (1) this was not like any other Catholic church I'd ever been in; and (2) God lives here. Passing through the doorway, the first thing you notice is the large "wall" that separates the people from the altar area. The wall is properly called an iconostasis and is covered with icons...sacred paintings, done in a very Byzantine, two-dimensional style, of Christ, Mary, other saints, angels, and events from the life of Christ. Also, by the time we arrived (5 minutes before liturgy), the smell of incense was already filling the air. The church in which I was raised only used incense on special days...definitely on Easter, maybe on Christmas, rarely any other time. This was a "regular" Sunday, and the incense was part of it.

Once liturgy began, I realized that what I had suspected upon entering the church was true. The set of rituals used by the Byzantine Catholics were those of the Orthodox Church. The rituals I had read about and had wanted to see for myself by visiting an Orthodox church I had unintentionally found in a Catholic church. In the short term, this was wonderful. This was not the Catholic Church as I knew it. The Divine Liturgy (the equivalent of the Mass in the Latin Rite) was scripturally rich, theologically deep, and personally meaningful. There was a sense of reverence, awe, and worship that I had never seen in a Latin-Rite church. If anything, it seemed like the people in the Latin-Rite were more interested in fulfilling an obligation rather than experiencing the presence of the Living God. There was (and still is) a parish in my home town that has Mass on Saturday afternoon at 4:30 and at 5:30 in the same "space". You can only imagine how fast the 4:30 Mass must go in order to clear the church and the parking lot to make way for the people attending at 5:30. We often used to joke that they should consider putting in a drive-thru, with the people receiving communion and a small card with the readings for the day in a ziplock bag from the window. Regardless of the parish, you would be hard-pressed to find a Mass that takes more that 50 minutes on any given Sunday morning. By contrast, the Divine Liturgy of the Byzantine Rite takes at least 75 minutes, and usually takes closer to 90. The more relaxed pace of the Liturgy (due mainly to the fact that the entire Liturgy is chanted a capella) and the solemnity of the prayers (a solemnity enhanced by their length) made it obvious that these people were here because they wanted to be here. There was a sense of "we know this isn't easy, and we don't care, because this is the correct way to worship God". The emptiness I had known as Catholicism was not true of this kind of Catholicism, and I wanted more of it.

After that one visit, I did not want to go back to any Latin-Rite church, and for the most part I didn't. There were occasional Sundays when I went to church with my mom and dad, or when Terrie and I went to church with her parents, but when we went to church ourselves, we went to St. John Chrysostom.

However, there were still the theological issues: the filioque, original sin, and the Pope. You see, even though the rituals are different among the different rites, the beliefs are the same. So, as much as the Byzantine Rite was clearly a step in the correct direction, I felt there was still more to be found, that somehow "the truth" was still just beyond the horizon. After a lot of discussion, I convinced Terrie that we should visit an Orthodox church. This was a hard sell, given the stance of her mom toward any church that was not Catholic, and truth be told we did not tell her mom where we went to church that morning in 1987. Going to a wonderful Greek Orthodox church turned out to be a huge mistake. I know now that getting to the church at 8am for Orthros (which I didn't realize was matins) meant that we were a full 90 minutes early for the Divine Liturgy. At 8 am, the church was empty, save us near the back, an elderly woman in the front, the cantor, and the priest. And since everything was chanted in Greek, we were truly lost. As 9:30 drew closer, a few more people entered the church, but even so most of the people did not arrive until well after the Liturgy had started. It was the same rituals, but these people did not have the same seriousness of purpose as the parishioners at St. John Chrysostom. Despite this, I saw this as a reason to learn more. Obviously I had missed something in my reading, and rather than pass it off as the fault of the people at the Orthodox church, I took it as my fault for thinking I could "get it" just by reading about "it". Terrie did not. She was not interested in the theological aspects of the faith at that time. She was, however, interested in the seriousness of purpose we had found at St. John Chrysostom, and as such did not want to return to any Orthodox church ever again. With some reservation, I agreed, and St. John Chrysostom became our home. We did not step foot into another Orthodox church for a full 15 years. For the most part, however, it was a wonderful 15 years.

To be continued...

Journey to Orthodoxy, Part 2

The Search Begins

The vast majority of the people with whom I went high school fall into one of the following two categories:

(1) no longer Catholic and don't belong to any particular church, but still Christian; or

(2) still Catholic, not as a result of being convinced that Catholicism is the truth, but because, courtesy of being raised Catholic, it's comfortable and easy.

I, however, upon graduating from high school, felt the need to make up for what was lacking in my formal religious education. So, I began to take a close look at the Catholic Church, what it believed, how it worshiped, and compared it with what I believed. There were several things I found I simply didn’t believe:

(1) the Pope is infallible

The idea that the Holy Spirit is inspiring exactly one man to proclaim the truth flies in the face of the early Church, in particular the council held in Jerusalem mentioned in the Book of Acts where Peter was on the side of the heretics. And there is a long list of inconsistencies, some obvious and some more technical in nature. An example of “the obvious” is the fact that Pope Honorius I was condemned by name as a heretic. It also didn't make sense that the Catholic Church didn't figure out that the Pope was infallible until the mid 1800's.

(2) we are guilty of Adam's sin

I'm OK with being guilty of my own sins, and with repenting them, but to say that I'm guilty of what someone else chose to do simply doesn't make sense. And considering the amount of Catholic theology that is based on this rendering of the concept of original sin (in particular, the Immaculate Conception and limbo), questioning this concept turns out to be huge.

(3) the procession of the Holy Spirit

It's right there in the Gospels. First, in John 15:26, Jesus says that the Spirit proceeds from the Father, not from the Father and the Son as the Catholic version of the Nicene Creed states. Second, in Luke 1, the angel tells Mary that she will conceive Jesus by the Holy Spirit. To say that the Spirit proceeds from the Son when it was the Spirit who "sent" Christ into the world doesn't make sense. So, there's something wrong with the official Creed of the Catholic Church.

In short, I found three big theological problems with what the Catholic Church professes. This shook the foundations of everything I believed. So, with a completely open mind, I went looking.

To begin the search, I started reading, and I quickly realized that regardless of how contradictory I was finding Catholic doctrine and how empty I was finding Catholic worship, Christ was still the truth. And that's what I was looking for: the truth. I probably wouldn't have put it into those words at the time, but looking back I can see that the entire journey was a search for the truth. There seemed to be hints of the truth in lots of other religions and philosophies, including Buddhism, Hinduism, and Islam, but I wasn’t looking for “hints” of the truth. I wanted the truth in its entirety, and Christianity was undoubtedly step one on the road toward it.

So, I started reading about the origins and theologies of the different Christian denominations: Lutheran, Methodist, Baptist, Presbyterian, and on and on. I also visited church after church, including some non-denominational Christian churches. I thought Catholicism was empty; I was wrong. Catholicism was lacking; Protestantism was empty. Catholics could at least give you some sense of what they believed beyond "I believe in Jesus" and "I believe in the Bible"; most Protestants (especially the non-denominational and Evangelical Protestants) couldn't. And of those that could, there was a major problem.

At the beginning of the search, I was focused on finding a Christian church that didn't profess any of (1)-(3) above. Of course, none of the other Christian denominations agree with (1). (3) just wasn't mentioned very much in what I read, and in fact of the other denominations that used or at least professed an official creed, all of them used the version of the Nicene Creed that included the phrase "and the Son". So this at least narrowed the options. Then there's (2). Seeming all of the other denominations bought into (2). Following in the footsteps of Augustine, man is born with the taint of original sin, as guilty of the sin of Adam as if each had committed the sin personally. Trying to find a church that avoided (2) left me with two options: a non-denominational Christian church (where as long as you believe “in Jesus and the Bible” the rest of what you believe tends not to matter), and one that seemed intriguing but with which I had no previous contact: Orthodoxy.

Now, let’s be clear: Orthodoxy is not a Protestant denomination. Most of the Protestant denominations that exist today began with the same basic premise: the congregation we are currently with is wrong on several points, so we’ll leave and form our own congregation. And even those that originally sought to reform the Catholic church from within (Martin Luther would be included with this group) quickly figured out that such efforts usually result in your excommunication, forcing you and your followers to form your own congregation. Orthodoxy, by contrast, traces its origins to the day of Pentecost in 33 A.D., and its break from Catholicism around 1054 A.D. was due to mutual excommunications: the Eastern Christians (now known as the Orthodox) threw the Western Christians (now known as the Catholics) out of the church, and the Catholics threw the Orthodox out as well. While there were lots of politically-driven reasons for the split, many the result of the east-west split that occurred in the Roman Empire, there were also theological reasons. In particular, the Eastern Christians faulted the Western Christians for the addition they made to the Nicene Creed (the “filioque”), for their incorrect translation of Romans 5:12 that lead to an incorrect view of original sin, and for their emphasis of the primacy of the bishop of Rome.

Does this list look familiar? Needless to say, I was very focused on learning more about Orthodoxy, and the more I learned, the more convinced I was that Orthodoxy was the keeper of the truth. It was time to visit an Orthodox church and experience the worship I had read so much about, worship that was continually described as indescribable.

At the time, the girl I was dating (currently known as “my wife “ J) had received an assignment in her home-ec class at the same Catholic high school from which I had graduated. The assignment was to visit a different church and write a paper about the experience (do not ask why (1) the assignment was in a home-ec class; or (2) the Catholic high school was encouraging students to visit other churches…I don’t have an answer for either question). Now, my mother-in-law had converted to Catholicism, and as such had been shunned by her father, who in turn prevented any other members of the family from having anything to do with her. My wife never knew any of her relatives on her mother’s side of the family until her grandfather died. My mother-in-law had given up her entire family for the sake of converting to Catholicism (and for my father-in-law), and as such was firmly against the idea of her daughter attending a different church for any reason, even if it was only for one Sunday. In need of a compromise, we found one: St. John Chrysostom Byzantine Catholic Church. It was still Catholic, so my mother-in-law was content. It was different enough that the home-ec teacher was content. Visiting there one Sunday would impact the next 15+ years of our lives.

To be continued…